How to Write a DxC High School Fanfic!
by Cereal-Killa
Summary: Here's your guide! *throws it at you* - If you take this seriously, you are deeply disturbed.


**warning: this was made to be funny. if you take this seriously, dude, get a fucking life. and when you do, tell me where to find one. because me writing this proves i don't have one. at all. and no! I did not mean to offend anyone in particular, this is really how I see some fics and just how they are. I've written like, 70 just like it, so no hate.**

**Read a Naruto fic like this and decided to make one of my own! :) Enjoy~**

* * *

><p>How to Write a DxC High School Fanfic!<p>

HEY GUYS! Duncan/Courtney owns the Total Drama Fandom, and you know what people love to do? Take our campers and put them in Hell- I MEAN HIGH SCHOOL!

So just in case you were wondering, here's how you write one! I know because my first D/C high school fic was just so damn sucessful. *cough*NOT*cough*

* * *

><p><strong>1- Setting<strong>

Either Canada or the US. Take your pick.

Put them in some high school. It doesn't matter what the high school looks like or what the name of the high school is, so don't bother naming these facts. Readers don't give a shit anyway.

That's pretty much it.

No one cares where they are.

Really. They don't.

They'll never send a review about it.

Because.

They just don't care.

* * *

><p><strong>2- Characters<strong>

Options:

(1)- Include every single character on the show somehow, or give a mild description of them in the beginning. Don't mention them again and make sure they have absolutely no plot dynamic.

(2)- Make up your own OC(s). Base the OC off of you or your best friend or your 'hawt super smexy bf'. Make your OC(s) get together with one of the original Total Drama cast mates. Make them a Mary Sue.

(Just do it. It's unavoidable anyway.)

(3)- Add Geoff, Bridgette, Gwen, and Trent. No other characters are necessary.

(4)- Only include Duncan and Courtney because all the other characters fucking suck.

Also, Chris will be the teacher/principle. Or you will make an OC for that too. This OC also doesn't ass anything to the plot.*

Heather will somehow ruin everything for everyone because she's a freaking bitch.

*OC's can add to the plot. If you want them in the plot, have them over power the original characters and thus ruining the whole story.

* * *

><p><strong>3- Doing CIT's the right way (A guide to writing Courtney)<strong>

Courtney is the ultimate bitch. Heather, a bigger bitch, is her worst enemy even though she was actually Gwen's worst enemy in the show. But we don't like Gwen. So no one gives a shit.

Anyway.

Courtney is super smart, bossy, and enjoys being an ass to people. She has friends in spite of this however. Bridgette is her best friend. NO EXCEPTIONS.

Gwen can be her other best friend.*

Courtney has a sibling. Design your OC in any manner you wish. Make them nothing like Courtney and base them off of your best friend/boyfriend/other person no one on FF gives two shits about.

Courtney's parents are not necessary, unless you want more OC's.

Courtney hits Duncan all the time. It's not abuse though. It's love taps.

Courtney's eyes change color.

Some say they are onyx.

Some say they are brown.

Some say they are green.

Doesn't matter as long as you refer to them as 'orbs' at some point. (i.e. Duncan looked into Courtney's bright onyx orbs.)

Courtney bitchiness will fade. By the end of the story, she should be completely OOC. :)

*Bridgette and Gwen are OOC. NO EXCEPTIONS.

* * *

><p><strong>4- Channeling your inner badass (A guide to writing Duncan)<strong>

Duncan is a quote- 'badass' -unquote. He's either the new kid or the guy Courtney has been going to school with for years but for some reason never noticed until now.

His friends are Geoff (NO EXCEPTIONS) and possibly Trent/DJ. They are interchangeable considering they will have no personality/character dynamic throughout the story.

Duncan's dad is a cop and hates Duncan. (NO EXCEPTIONS)

Duncan's mom is super nice. This is why Duncan turned out like such an asshole, obviously. (NO EXCEPTIONS)

Duncan WILL have daddy issues. (NO EXCEPTIONS)

He speaks another language (French, Italian, German, Japanese, take your choice) and eventually seduces Courtney with it.

Everyone wants to be with/fuck/kiss Duncan. EVERYONE.

Duncan is a troublemaker, gets bad grades, and has been to juvie. He still goes to a good school.

He hates Harold.

Duncan will like Courtney before she likes him.

He will never try to have sex with Courtney or even imply it because he is a virgin who is saving himself because Duncan is just so freaking romantic.

* * *

><p><strong>5- Summary and Content Rating<strong>

Rated K- Never rate it K.

Rated K+- Never rate it K+.

Rated T- Make it rated T even if there is no character death/cursing/implications of sex or anything mildly teen. Just make it T because that's cool and old and mature so people are gonna read it since it's so advanced.

Rated M- Make it M if there is kissing. Any kissing at all. And if they say the F word. Because OMG, the F word is scary!

Make your summary short and vague. Put in little to punctuation and several grammatical errors throughout.

EXAMPLE: Courtney iz a stupid prep when Duncan cums and he is a bad boy what will happens? D/C G/T G/B I WILL ONLY UPDATE IF I GET FIFTEEN REVIEWZZZ!111!

(Mention Gwen/Trent and Geoff/Bridgette even if it's not in the story. Because that's why people read Duncan/Courtney. For the Gwen/Trent and Geoff/Bridgette. DUH.)

Make the title whatever. Not like anyone gives a fuck.

* * *

><p><strong>6- The Story<strong>

Duncan and Courtney hate each other.

They start to like each other.

Make one of them kiss the other.

The other one should run off because for some reason when you really like someone and they kiss you, you are supposed to run away. Don't question it. Just write it, dammit.

Put Heather in there too and make her do something to screw things up, because without her, Duncan and Courtney's relationship would have gone SO smoothly.

Right.

HEARTBREAK TIME!

This period usually only lasts for one chapter due to bad review response and the fact that writing angst is too stressful, so you should just write more fluff. Because this fandom doesn't have enough of that already.

Make them have a revelation, or don't. Just have one of them go and shove their tongue down the others throat.

They get together.

Geoff and Bridgette get together.

Gwen and Trent get together.

Your OC gets together with Chris or someone.

Heather is alone and dies or whatever.

Duncan and Courtney make-out. You can end the story with implied sex, a lame lemon, or drag the story out until no one reads it anymore/you stop updating because you ran out of ideas or failed your Chemistry class and got your laptop taken away.

If you do make it to the end, do at least one the two:

(1)- Insert the lyrics of your favorite song even if it has nothing to do with the story and make Duncan sing it to Courtney.

(2)- Make sure Duncan and Courtney are both OOC as hell.

* * *

><p><strong>DA END.<strong>

SO NOW GO WRITE ONE!

HERP DERP.


End file.
